Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Existential Question Artist or Employee

-
Are we what we do or what we believe we are or what others believe us to be? One the first questions we are asked or ask to ascertain information about someone is,  "what do you do". By there response we think we obtain some understanding about an individual. But are we really what we do? I have a full time job. I get up each morning, make my way through traffic to work at a computer, attend meetings and conference calls, and hopefully make educated decisions.  So does doing this make me less of an artist? This is a question I often battle with in my own head. I sometimes feel as if I am living two different lives, the corporate and the creative one. Yet neither one defines me. They are just things I do.
 -
 Just because I work for a large company does not make me less of an individual artist. From time to time I need a reminder of this. It was during one of these moments that I stumbled upon Summer Pierre's The Artist in the Office. This was a fun read that helped remind me of some of the basics of living a creative life. It is all a matter of perspective and sometimes we just have to stop and look at things from a different point of view.
-
Now with refreshed perspective I decided I could also use some reminders on how to balance my various roles while doing my best at each. Several years ago I had read Julia Cameron's The Sound of Paper. It had been a beneficial experience, so when I saw The Artist Way At Work I purchased it. Only it sat on my bookshelf unread until June of this year. Running into my own little existential crisis I pulled it off the shelf three weeks ago. The book outlines a 12 week program for anyone looking to tap into the keys of creativity in the workplace and life in general. Only three weeks in, I am still attempting to reestablishing the habits I had put in place in 2008 which I long since let slide.
-
It was while I was having this self dialog about if one can truly be an artist while holding a full time job that I picked up Alaa Al Aswany's Friendly Fire.  Standing in the bookstore I  read the Preface trying to decide if I wanted to purchase this book. I came to section 2 where the author describes how he came to be a writer while working as a dentist in Cairo. I was instantly sold. Not only could I relate to the struggle but it was so eloquently written I knew I had to read more. Friendly Fire is a series of short stories each full of characters developed so beautifully I felt as if I knew them. Through Aswany's depictions the characters became real and present. I carried this book in my purse reading a short story during a break from work or while waiting for an appointment. I still have a couple more stories to read before I'm finished, yet I am certain I will be looking for Alwany's other works Chicago and The Yacoubian Building the moment I am done. Alaa Al Aswany a brilliant writer and for me an inspiration.
-
So where has all this left me with my question of artist vs employee? I decided it doesn't really matter. I have wasted enough time thinking about it. I am what I am. I do what I do. I'd rather expend my energy doing and I'll leave the labeling to someone else.
-

No comments: